tfln

[i_wantmore]

01. I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.

02. She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.

03. I was gone for 30 minutes. How did you get arrested?

?04. He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying, “I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful” and then a facebook message at 6 am saying “hi” and the subject was “oh”.

05. [Text her.]